Set fire to your
Poke a stick at a grizzly
Eat medicine that's out of
Use your private parts as piranha

Dumb ways to die
So many dumb ways to die
Dumb ways to di-ie-ie
So many dumb ways to die

Get your toast out with a
Do your own electrical
Teach yourself how to
Eat a two-week-old un-refrigerated

Dumb ways to die ...

Invite a psycho-killer
Scratch a drug dealer's brand new
Take your helmet off in outer
Use a clothes dryer as a hiding

Dumb ways to die ...

Keep a rattlesnake as a
Sell both your kidneys on the
Eat a tube of super
I wonder, what's this red button ?

Dumb ways to die ...

Dress up like a moose during hunting
Disturb a nest of wasps for no good
Stand on the edge of a train station
Drive around the boom gates at a level
Run across the tracks between the

They may not rhyme but they're quite
The dumbest ways to die
The dumbest ways to die
The dumbest ways to di-ie-ie-ie
So many dumb
So many dumb ways to die